Avoid Conventional Distractions and Discover Happiness and Peace
I was distracted over the last few months, pursuing conventional opportunities that are full of bureaucracy, politics and strict ways of doing things. They were not representative of my creative spirit. Instead, they dampened my spirit, making me feel depressed, lonely and not good enough.
Why would I pursue anything that would make me feel so incredibly sad? Perhaps it is because of the lurking envious societal notion that I have to fit my life into a narrow picture window of accepted accomplishments and accolades. Nothing is ever grand enough. I have to reach higher. Just doing something isn't accepted. I have to move forward in a perfectly elusive manner that is so exquisite and mind blowing that no one will understand how I reached the level I did.
Yet I cannot seem to reach this fictional summit. It is evasive and stealth, escaping my vision, when I finally think I can see it. Then I stumble, sliding mercilessly down the rocky incline, my body feeling as if it is splintering into a million wooden shards. These shards introduce double-edged, painful slivers as reminders of my failure.
But are these tumbles really failures or simply reminders I'm pursuing the wrong, conventional, bureaucratic path that would only lead to further unhappiness? I have to believe they are. I'm not conventional. I'm a quirky, creative person who likes to pursue entrepreneurial, autonomous leadership opportunities that exude compassion and real human emotions that pioneer authenticity, action and real, meaningful conversation. That is who I am. Now I have to keep writing and let my creative spirit guide me. Perhaps then I can find peace.
Why would I pursue anything that would make me feel so incredibly sad? Perhaps it is because of the lurking envious societal notion that I have to fit my life into a narrow picture window of accepted accomplishments and accolades. Nothing is ever grand enough. I have to reach higher. Just doing something isn't accepted. I have to move forward in a perfectly elusive manner that is so exquisite and mind blowing that no one will understand how I reached the level I did.
Yet I cannot seem to reach this fictional summit. It is evasive and stealth, escaping my vision, when I finally think I can see it. Then I stumble, sliding mercilessly down the rocky incline, my body feeling as if it is splintering into a million wooden shards. These shards introduce double-edged, painful slivers as reminders of my failure.
But are these tumbles really failures or simply reminders I'm pursuing the wrong, conventional, bureaucratic path that would only lead to further unhappiness? I have to believe they are. I'm not conventional. I'm a quirky, creative person who likes to pursue entrepreneurial, autonomous leadership opportunities that exude compassion and real human emotions that pioneer authenticity, action and real, meaningful conversation. That is who I am. Now I have to keep writing and let my creative spirit guide me. Perhaps then I can find peace.
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